Evil Twin Disorder
by purplegiraffe21
Summary: In a world of Internet Gaming and bad accents, Evil Twin Disorder wreaks havoc on the world. No one can escape. Can Rage and his friends defeat the odds and save the remainder of mankind?
1. Chapter 1

"Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeellllllllllllllllooooooooo people! My name is Rage, and welcome to another episode of Plague Inc: Evolved. It has been a while since I filmed one of these, and we just unlocked a new plague type." He instantaneously (coincidently his favourite word) switched to an awful Scottish accent.

"We're going to infect some people today laddy! It looks like ... TENTACLES!." He proceeded to finish the intro, a long but essential task (being PART OF THE ENTERTAINMENT), then made the video- infecting the world with 'Evil Twin Disorder'. When he was done, he shut the computer down, tired and unwilling to edit the footage. He headed downstairs to make his dinner. '_I think I'll have burgers tonight'._

* * *

Curling, twisting seeking. The smoke, dense with oil and fat, crept towards the bedroom. Carried by the draft coming from the hallway, it slid through the gap beneath the bedroom door. It spread through the room, seemingly in search of something, when it came to the computer. It had found what it was looking for.

* * *

Rage drummed his fingers on the desk impatiently as he waited for Hollow. At last there was Skype's familiar 'glop' sound and they were talking. 'Hey man, what took you so long?' Rage asked, shaking his head. 'Hello?'

'Aaron, I'm here!'

'Hello? I can't hear you my Internet's being slow.'

'Aaron?'

'Josh? Hello?'

'God dammit Aaron sort it out.' Rage shouted at his monitor with contempt. 'Ok, done. What's up, man?' Hollow asked pleasantly. 'What's up? Oh I don't know, maybe the fact that we need to record and you're faffing around.' said Rage, annoyed, 'Woah, I just had a bad connection!' Said Hollow, "Well, I need to do a sound check"

"You do this every time, you're so paranoid"

"Just because it hasn't happened yet doesn't mean it won't, Hollow you...you...sick-minded waffle"

"Sick? Sick minded waffle? Are you serious?" Hollow bursts out laughing

"Shut up man, I'm under pressure."

"How exactly?"

"I don't know I just feel... different somehow."


	2. Chapter 2

Rage woke up the next morning a bear with a sore head. He pulled clothes onto his body like a zombie- black jeans and a red RageGaming™ t shirt, cursing as he fumbled with the zip on the coat shrugged on over his shoulders.

A few students smiled as they passed him in the hallway, 'Hey Josh! How are you?' said one guy, a pimply kid with a makeshift mullet. In reply Rage simply grunted and walked on. He got to his mail like he did every morning. He turned over each envelope and groaned. Bills, bills and more bills. 'Fuck!' he snarled as he headed back up. More people passed him on the stairs with good greetings and smiles. Damn these kids with their chirpy voices and their springy steps. Damn it all to hell.

Wait, what was he doing? Today was a great day! He had just uploaded a mapstrav(aganza) - one of his most popular shows that he did with his best friend, and now he got to read the comments which would make him chuckle no doubt! He headed back to his place and grabbed a piece of toast which he munched on as he flicked through the comments. Vote 3, vote 1, vote 3, vote evanz, vote 4. He skimmed over these and read the comments pertaining to the content. 'Rage seems different today' read one, and 'Rage was kind of a dick to Hollow in this episode'. Rage read through these with increasing confusion and curiosity. 'Look at 34:56 there's a block on the floor, Rage cheated!'

Rage's eyes widened as he got further down the page. 'What is with Rage? Hollow was obviously telling the truth not him!' There were even people threatening to unsubscribe, which would have amused him had he not been so confused. What exactly had he said last night?

Glop. The sound of the incoming Skype call jolted Rage out of his thoughts. Seeing the caller ID was Fluke, without hesitation he selected the green button, the best button (assuming you are not being stalked by the infiltrator of the call).

"Hey man" Flukes voice drifted out of the computer's speakers.

"Hey"

"Are you doing anything?"

Hundreds of scenarios sprinted their way through Rage's mind, each more ridiculous than the next. Panicked and realising he needed to reply,

"Not much...was reading comments, why what's up?"

"Well someone sent me salad simulator on steam and I know you did a review, so would you may be like to stream it with the rest of the crew? It could be fun!"

_It could be a disaster, _the sarcastic reply wanted to be spoken, but Rage managed to hold it back,

"Sure...why not"

"Cool I'll call the rest of the guys"

"Right now?"

"Is there a problem?"

"No, no, of course not, everything's fine" said Rage, feeling slightly hysterical, "right now is good "

"Okay great!"

"Let me get ready then"

"Of course, see you in 10?"

"Yeah, see you"

The end of call tone was accompanied by a sigh of relief from Rage. Unfortunately for Rage the moment only lasted half-way through the sigh before the panic set in.

Pacing the room in agitation, Rage's thoughts were in total disarray. He contemplated excuse after excuse, trying to dig himself out of the hole he had made. As always, he came up with none, and so proceeded instead to keep digging. Hopefully he would come out the other side. _What was the worst that could happen?_

That thought was promptly followed by a rather discouraging one, "_you could die". _"SHUT UP HOLLOW!"

* * *

The usual stream music filtered through the room, though it was wasted on Rage, who barely noticed it. He and Fluke were making (vague) plans for the stream, while they waited for the stream to fill up with people. 'Wow, 160 so far, that's a decent turnout' remarked Fluke. 'Yeah… great' said Rage half-heartedly, palms sweaty and on the brink of a nervous breakdown.

"Are you okay, you look a little peaky?"

"… Couldn't be better"

"You still sound a bit off"

Glop. The exchange was interrupted by an incoming call from Hollow.

"Hi Will, when's the stream starting?"

"A couple minutes, we start by playing my salad simulator, then we'll probably end on a hungergames."

"Sounds good"

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME"

There was an awkward silence while Hollow and Fluke processed this. Hollow was the first to recover, and ventured to tentatively placate.

"Er...what's up Josh?"

"Don't act like you don't know."

"I really don't, enlighten me."

"Whatever man, let's just do the stream"

Had the moment not been so awkward, and had Rage not been so genuinely enraged at that moment, the event that followed would have been comical. Rage was shaking his fists at his computer, snarling cuss words menacingly under his breath as Fluke welcomed the viewers.


	3. Chapter 3

Evanz had had a good day. No sheep jokes, and a free blueberry muffin, courtesy of his mum in Clophill. Too bad it went downhill after making the decision to join a stream with Fluke, Rage and Hollow.

"Oh great, now freaking Evanz has joined. Brilliant, just brilliant"

"Haha Rage, you joker, you. So... Evanz, welcome to the stream"

Rage cut Evanz off before he had the chance to reply.

"Fucking Joker. I'll show you a joker in a minute if you're not careful."

"Well I'm batman so that's okay." said Hollow.

That random interruption from Hollow brought the conversation to an awkward standstill.

Unfortunately (for Fluke and Evanz) Hollow didn't seem to notice.

"I just made a pun, aren't you going to congratulate me and shit?. You do have a moronic fetish for it"

Sensing the beginning of a fight, Fluke tried to cut them off a the chase.

"That was a good one right Rage?" prompted Fluke, trying to sound at least a smidgen light hearted.

"No"

The rest of the stream followed in a similarly unorthodox manner. Unsurprisingly, the stream ended shortly after the joker conversation, as they couldn't stand a further half an hour of rage living up to his name, and hollow doing a convincing impression of the name. They never did get to play the hunger games.

* * *

It was the dreary morning after the infamous stream took place and Hollow was nursing a hangover. He had had such high hopes, he'd thought it'd be a barrel of laughs. He shook his head as he flicked through the comments. It was no coincidence more than ever had watched that stream then any other. Why did people flock to other people's embarrassment?

Are rage and hollow not friends anymore?

What the hell rage?

WTF

Hollow felt a growing sense of dread as he read. Everyone seemed shocked at him and Rage, but what had actually happened? The memories of last night were hazy and uncertain. Was he just really wasted? Or was there something else going on?

With the comments still ringing through his ears, he made his normal cup of tea. He had three cups in the cupboard that were clean. Not really in the mood to ponder his choices he grabbed the one on the left. Before he could even tell his arm to move, the mug slid from his fingers and landed with an impressive crash on the tiled floor. It rebounded slightly, before cracking in half. A light blue shard flew into the air, and Hollow's rendition of all the swear words in existence confirmed that it lodged itself in Hollow's foot.

It was all Fluke's fucking fault. He suggested the livestream. He invited Rage. If that livestream hadn't happened his foot would be fine.

As you can see, Hollow's reasoning was questionable, but nevertheless he attempted to hobble about, the fragment of ceramic still wedged deep into his foot.

He retrieved a first aid kit, wincing and swearing with every movement he made and with a scowl on his face that could only be described as the facial personification of annoyance. He roughly fished out a bandage and some antiseptic. Too bad he didn't have any freaking tweezers. He'd have to use his caveman tools. He scowled even more at that and came extremely close to punching a wall.

He punched a wall.

The wall was everything that annoyed him in that moment. The shard in his foot. Rage's miserable mug. Fluke's annoyingly attractive face. Even Evanz, who had done nothing wrong. It was not a good day.


	4. Chapter 4

Rage stared straight ahead, his head nodding down and then jerking back up again every so often. He stifled a yawn, covering his mouth with the back of his hand. Absent-mindedly, he giggled to himself as he imagined the professor, a good-natured balding man who called himself Mr G, adorned with a riding crop, mounting a horse (this is not that kind of fan fiction you sick-minded waffle). To you or me, this would seem a strange thing to find funny as a lot of people ride horses. However to a silly drunk-tired Rage, bizarre thoughts like these came naturally and frequently. If you asked him about it, he would most likely tell you to not question it.

He continued in this manner for quite some time, only half-listening to Mr G and amusing himself with perfectly ordinary objects in the room.

"What the fuck, Rage."

Rage snapped his head up, alarmed. He looked around him. The nearby circle of students were all taking notes or staring straight ahead to Mr G. Rage shook his head and started to pay attention.

"Watch out."

It was Mr G. Except it wasn't him at the same time. It wasn't anyone. Mr G was staring right at him, yet not seeing him. It was his voice, but his lips weren't moving. Again, Rage glanced around but saw no-one seemed to notice.

"Don't ignore me, you peasant. Look at me."

Shaken, Rage said "Look where? Who are you?"

"I think you know. Yes, I think you have a very good idea who I am. I am, after all, part of you."

"Part of me? You mean like Katy Perry?"

There was no answer. Rage thought long and hard.

"I give up."

"Of course you do. You've always been the weak, cowardly one. The one who apologises after I show people who's boss. The one who says 'I'm so sorry' after I offend whole nations. You have hindered me too long, but it's my time now. We'll see who doesn't get the bitches now."

Rage's eyes widened. "T- Timothy?"

"Muahahahhhaa yes it is I, the one you have a ridiculed all these years, the one you have turned people against. And now thanks to you, I can break free."

"Thanks to me- what do you mean?"

Darkness...

Rage sat up in bed. He went about his normal morning routine, with a peculiar feeling that a blanket had been laid across his senses. A state of partial awareness that he contributed to the usual bleary-eyed sensation he woke to after deep sleep. It was odd how he still felt immensely tired, relying on auto-pilot rather than him.

Once again Rage went downstairs to check his mail. Luckily, Rage didn't have an excuse to be angry as the only mail he had was a coupon for a free bag of potatoes at Tesco's. Rage was definitely going to make use of that.

As he stepped back into the main building, a guy, who Rage had a couple of classes with, was struggling to get through the door as he was laden with shopping bags. "Let me give you a hand." said Rage kindly, opening the door wide. With a grateful nod, he picked up the remaining bags and straightened.

The door slammed shut.

Rage, more than slightly confused, grabbed it again but once more he just let it close. "Whatever man, I don't have time for this.'" muttered the guy, the resent audible in his voice, going through the adjacent swinging door.

That incident really set the tone for his whole day.

He _nearly_ shoplifted, picking up and putting back down items until the manager asked him to leave. He bumped into someone, left without apologising then came running back to beg forgiveness. He refused when someone politely asked to borrow his notes, then ended up doing most of the work for them. The list goes on.

When Rage got back that night, his brain felt like it had been reduced to a puddle of goo from the heated debates inside his own head. He sunk onto the couch, before screaming into his pillow (much to the pillow's annoyance). He grabbed a heavy hardback book from the bookshelf and hurled it at the wall, then jumped up to retrieve it.

Exasperated, Rage turned to the only option he had left.

"What's should I do Ailya?"

Ailya stared at him blankly before continuing to munch on her crickets.

"I think I'm being possessed by Timothy."

Ailya was now basking in the warmth of her heat lamp.

"Doesn't this remind you of the disease I made on plague inc?"

Ailya took a drink from her bowl.

"Yeah I guess it's just a coincidence, but I have been feeling really weird all week."

"Try your whole life."

"...Ailya?"

"Didn't you know leopard geckos can talk."

"No, but that's really cool, what else can you do."

"...are you serious?"

"You're right, that you can talk is amazing in itself, it's unreasonable to expect you to be able to do more."

"…LEOPARD GECKOS CAN'T TALK IDIOT. It's me, Timothy. Christ you're dumb."

"I thought I woke up from that dream, am I in a dream inside a dream? Or a dream inside of a dream inside of a dream? Because that would explain why this last week has been so weird!"

Rage smiled to himself, pleased with what he had deducted.

"You wish dumb-ass."

"I don't understand."

"That's understandable, I am the more intelligent part of us."

"But-"

Timothy cut Rage off.

"I'll just be plotting to destroy the world while you figure it out."


	5. Chapter 5

Fluke was concerned. Rage and Hollow had been acting so strangely during the stream, and he didn't know what to make of their character transplant. They were like different people. He ran a few possibilities through his mind. Aliens? Drugs? Illuminati? No, the only explanation is that they had some kind of mental illness.

He logged onto his computer and google searched their … "symptoms". He came up with: PTSD; acute stress disorder; schizophrenia. He kept scrolling down until he came to...

"Rage's _plague inc._ video?"

* * *

"Hello everyone, and welcome to –"

"Curaxu's school of hard blocks!"

"I thought I said I would do the intro,"

"The show is named after me, so I should do it,"

"- And I told you, it's my channel! I'm doing it,"

Curaxu and Hollow bickered for a further five minutes, before reluctantly coming to a compromise.

"Hello everyone!" They said in unison, "Welcome to Curaxu's school of hard blocks,"

Hollow scowled, irked by Curaxu's voice grating on his ears,

"Yes, we are back! The last series went a bit stale, but now, we are doing something new! So Cura, what are we doing?"

"A hunger games map!" Curaxu exclaimed in his soothing Flemish tones, "and hopefully you will be able to build a hunger games map of your own with out my help,"

"yeah..." That _was _his long term goal after all, and he should be grateful for Curaxu's help, but he just felt irritated.

* * *

/undo. Ten minutes into the episode, and Hollow was already sick of making mistakes. Curaxu wasn't helping at all, just blabbing the same instructions over and over ... and now a fly was buzzing around his room. Just perfect. What was Curaxu talking about now? Depth. On and on and on about depth. Hollow was sick of depth. Screw depth.

* * *

Now they were finally finished, Hollow had to admit that what they'd done, looked cool. Maybe Curaxu's advice wasn't so useless after all. That didn't mean he didn't want to ditch the man as soon as he could. He may be knowledgeable, but he was getting in the way of his creative mastery! Harping on about depth, depth, depth.

Hollow's annoyance was near tangible, except Curaxu who was seemingly oblivious to Hollow's dark mood, or possibly tactically ignoring the situation.

Over the next three days, Hollow's mood got progressively worse. Even Curaxu's cheery facade was starting to wear thin after Hollow's constant barrage of complaints. Eventually it came a point of standstill, and Curaxu realised nothing more would get done today.

"Let's call it a day, I think we have enough for now"

"Ugh fine, didn't want to listen to you anymore anyway"

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that. Bye Aaron"

"Bye."

* * *

A couple days later they attempted to record a new episode. Complete and utter failure. Hollow was in a foul mood from the very start, but very soon, Curaxu was joining him in a torrent of short rants about the price of paper clips and unavailability of zebra themed pillow cases in Belgium. Curaxu hadn't even remembered ever being in dire need of zebra décor, but even so; all he knew was he couldn't find any websites which shipped them to Belgium.

"So, you take your brush tool," Curaxu explained impatiently- upset at Hollow not getting it after 6 episodes, "and you... you...". Curaxu tried out different combinations of words, in the hopes that one of the concoctions he conjured up would do something impressive.

/sphere p ~~1~160. /dome quartz 5. /pos 1, /pos 2, /replace air glass- FUCK! He couldn't remember how to Minecraft. He couldn't do it. He was as bad as Hollow. Hollow, the bastard, meanwhile was humbly choosing blocks from Curaxu's palette and trying to build a detailed wall with lots of depth. Maybe Curaxu would have better luck with that. Better than Hollow's pitiful attempts, anyway.

He jumped down to Hollow's level and started building, letting the clicking consume him- feeling the cooling sensation of his natural instinct wash over him. He ignored Hollow's continuous whines of, "Er, Cura." and "Dude, dude". At last happy with the depth, he took a step back and smiled as he came to face to face with a fire engine red swastika.


	6. Chapter 6

**AN:** _Hollow's true thoughts_

_Flashback before Rage developed his Timothy alter-ego._

Rage: And here we are ladies and gentlemen, on the creation for today and I am severely excited because this map is utterly inspired! And you don't get to make that expression often cos it's a truly posh English expression, don't-

_Why does Rage feel the need to babble like this at the start of every episode...Hang on._

Hollow: Sorry, what the fuck am I reading in here?

Rage: What?

Hollow: What? What?

Rage: What language is this?! It's not English!

Hollow: The fuck is, the fuck is this?

Rage: What do you mean what the fuck is this?

_Rage can stall like this for days, better to cut him off at the chase._

Hollow: This map revolves around Hollow and his huge movie series.

Rage: Yeah. That's why I'm excite, why I'm excited. Do you wanna know, do you wanna know what this dude has done? He has gone through maybe sixty episodes of map stravaganza, found literally every single deep dark hollow-

_This wasn't happening, no-one actually wasted their time on something like this , right? Who's that stupid? Aside from Rage._

Hollow: No!

Rage: … I've ever made and built a build for each one, and he's presented it flawlessly. You should be excited right now!

Hollow: Oh my God…

Rage: You don't sound too happy about this!

Hollow: Nooooooooooo! (Rage bursts out laughing)

Rage: I knew this would be fantastic (he laughs again)

Hollow: Aw!

Rage: Why are you not too excited man, what's wrong are you okay?

Hollow: It's all so terrible!

Rage: You've not even seen the map yet! (laughs)

Hollow: No! No, all the things you suggested ever about the topic is awful-

Rage: But I made you a movie star-

Hollow: Therefore you cannot physically make it good!

Rage: I made you a famous, rich movie star man, and you just hate me for it, it's not- you're so insensitive.

Hollow: I might just leave!

Rage: Deep Dark Hollow 107

Hollow: Shut the fuck up! Shut the fuck up!

Rage: HATES THE MAPPENING!

Hollow: Stop! (Rage laughs). No movie would make any money on the hundredth episode!

Rage: Oh, this map by Justin ten,

_Curse Justinkent110._

he has made every single deep dark hollow, we are going to go have a look at them. And I- I just, the dedication that he's gone through every episode to find them it's- trust me dude don't- it's alright man here, I'll pat you on the back. I'll pat you on the back it's okay. Just- come here, it's fine-

_There's no other option, I'll just have to kill myself._

No dude suicide is never the answer, okay? It's never the answer, stop it!.

_Maybe it won't be as bad as I think?_

Okay, so if we step through into the map- trust me okay, an open mind is really presented well. So here we are in a movie theatre, we have the Usher there and if we go over to him, "Are you here to see "Deep Dark Hollow"? Your movie's on the right and here are your popcorns, if it tastes like potatoes, don't worry about it." Well okay so here is the movie theatre, now showing until the end of time, deep dark hollow. So if you'd like to go in -

_I really don't._

\- and take your seat, the er blue seat put up for you, I will start the experience. So here's the opening movie screen, your face.

Hollow: Right

Rage: Okay? So let's begin our enjoyment, popcorn at the ready, the deep dark hollow. "What's going on? Why isn't the movie playing? Wow, what a pathetic fucking excuse for a map.

Wait! I think something is happening! How the hell did you know that? Wow how original the map creator-

_Why does my torture need an introduction.. or context for that matter._

Hollow: Jesus Christ, that's a lotta text.

Rage: Made a theatre and threw us into the movie. Oh my god, please"- that's your line. Oh, oh my god…

Hollow: Yeah you've just been doing mine as well actually-

Rage: Have I?

Hollow: But then you just kept going.

Rage: Oh, sorry…

_Don't be, I'm trying to pretend this map doesn't exist._

Hollow: "Oh my god, please don't tell we got teleported into the movie."

Rage: "Don't judge my map, it will judge itself, thank you."

_That was actually kind of funny_

Hollow: I just realised that we're in my dumb fan fiction of me, I fucking hate you this is your fault you made this." Yeah, I do-

_He knew and made the map anyway. Sadist._

Rage: You see? He knew how you'd do it! Oh, "Whatever fun-suck, deep dark is an amazing documentary of your life!"

Hollow: "Let's do the map."

_And get this over with._

Rage: "The chat's not going to fast you're just reading to slow"- I like how-

Hollow: Yeah, sure

Rage: …He covered himself at the end, yeah I know!

Hollow: Sure! (Rage laughs)

_Oh god, it's worse than I thought, much worse._

Rage: So the first movie, deep dark hollow one, hollow, deep dark. So you're down there, in the deep and dark. This is your first deep dark Hollow, your entry to the blockbuster genre! And then we have the sequel, are you er-

Hollow: Christ on a bicycle (Rage laughs)

Rage: I love this! Deep dark Hollow two, the deepening and the darkening!

_Please let this be some kind of nightmare_

Dude, we are in a slightly deeper and darker place now!

Hollow: Fucks sake!

Rage: Then if we go into the next one: deep dark Hollow, the deepest and the darkest, with the-

Hollow: Now we're like a level down!

Rage: Deeper and darker room! (He laughs) Oh, and then the next one, we have er-

Hollow: The worst films ever! (Rage laughs and gasps)

Rage: Deep dark hollow four, Hollow: the dark tigering! This was your, er, tribute to Life of Pi where you are on a boat with a tiger, so-

Hollow: In the dark, obviously…

Rage: Yeah, obviously you gotta, you now, deep dark Hollow,

Hollow: Yeah

Rage: You gotta keep the theme, theme through…

Hollow: Right, at least I fight a tiger.

_This is pretty cool, actually._

~32 deep dark hollows later...

Rage: So we're back in the deep dark cave. I just love that there's just three, twelve movies, all about the er, deep dark cave. Deep- oh look, this is probably my favourite one. Deep dark Hollow 36: the revengening of the Hollow vs. Negaclone funsuck, Hollow flies around fighting his clone because he was having too much fun for his liking and fought him into the ground and he died. Yeah that was the entire title of the movie.

Hollow: Wow.

Rage: There you are having an epic battle with your evil clone-

Hollow: That's the worst fucking name.

_My legacy, how can it be- why? How will I take over the world with my movie franchise with this- this, abomination of a title?_

Rage: (laughing) Yeah I know! Why- what was I thinking? Why didn't you stop me?

Hollow: I don't know! (Rage laughs) I think I just got tired of your shit and just like left and let you talk.

Rage: And then, deep dark 37: I can't believe how many there is, the dine-

Hollow: Is this how many you've done?

Rage: Yeah, these are all legit ones I have said he's not made any of them up!

Hollow: You're so fucking retarded!

Rage: The dinosaur feeling! Just you stood between the legs of a dinosaur!

Hollow: What the hell is that, why? Look let's - I don't want to even think about it!

Rage: You have a pet dinosaur man. Deep dark Hollow 40: returns to school.

Hollow: Why?

Rage: So this is your classroom. You returned to school, you needed to sharpen up your er-

Hollow: Right.

Rage: Yeah so, and then we're back in the sky for deep dark hollow 41 revengence, totally not a remake of deep dark 36 but this time he meets solid snake and becomes him. See?

Hollow: Well that's good.

Rage: Yeah you gotta like this one.

Hollow: That's good.

Rage: That's your favourite one so far, right?

Hollow: Yeah.

_Maybe now, it will happen!_

Rage: Yeah. See? I knew you'd like this one. It's your epic battle in the sky and then this one. And then this is my award for best one. Deep dark Hollow 48 he goes hard, and if you look, this is your skin, right?

Hollow: Right.

Rage: And this is the crotch area of your skin, ok. (Rage pulls the lever)

Hollow: Eugh god. (Rage laughs) Oh dear. Let's-let's put that back, no. (pulls lever again)

Rage: That's the best thing… That entire movie is about that.

Hollow: That's- that's awful.

Rage: Deep dark twen- 92: Alfred befriendening. This is where you befriended batman's er, Alfred.

Hollow: That's great news.

Rage: Yeah, so now you get the keys to the batmobile.

Hollow: That's pretty good.

_He is mine! We can take the world over today! That was the problem, a lack of endorsement… but now… the Empire, the Ragican Empire, and the rest of the world is MINE!_

Rage: I wonder what else is down here. Nothing. Literally…

Hollow: That's, that's that's useful.

Rage: Yeah, it's literally nothing. And there we go everyone. That was every deep dark I've ever said in map form. I mean, credit to the guy, you have to-

Hollow: It's a shame because for me all of these are Steve heads.

Rage: Yeah all of them are Steve heads for me as well.

Hollow: I think maybe he fucked that up.

Rage: Yeah I think he fucked up a little bit, but we just have to pretend.

Hollow: Yeah.

Rage: Yeah. Yeah. "Thank you for playing my map, now feel free to fly around and do whatever it is that you do at the end of creation! Amount of quality: first map. Amount of effort: three days without sleep or breaks," and then my favourite, "amounts of fucks given: blank sign."

Hollow: Haha.

_HOW DARE HE? MY EMPIRE, my MOVIE franchise, is deserving of a MILLION fucks given. He shall be my first target._

Rage: And then the final thing we have to look at is a lovely easter egg and this is how the layout of the map looks. That was very well done, I have to say. Come on, all of your feelings on this mantastic movie franchise aside-

Hollow: It's a well-made map

Rage: Guys.

Hollow: And it's funny, but I hate that it exists.

_My Kingdom cannot simply be BUILT. I am coming for you, justinkent110. Mark my words. Deep Dark Hollow is ready._


	7. Chapter 7

"I don't even know with you anymore. One minute you're like a fairytale pizza in Hawaii, and the next you're a miserable git."

"Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh can't argue with that. But… why are you sad about? Something that makes me sad maybe a couple hours ago because it would make me sad but if I hurt my elbow..."

"Josh, you're making no sense right now," Danni replied uncertainly, not sure whether to be concerned or pissed off at Rage's babbling.

"Love is very good because I love you. And this is very good with a heart and I..."

"Josh, I-"

"Once upon a time there was a little butterfly named Dozeye and he-"

"Josh please, just… here's some water, please calm-"

"He had bad news. He-"

Danni sighed and sat down. Her voice strained, she said "Please, Josh. Just come sit down, look we need to talk about this, I … STOP IGNORING ME!"

Rage giggled. "Hehe, you're cute when you're angry."

"Arsehole."

Danni stormed out, tears rolling down her cheeks, leaving the real Rage, who was a prisoner in his own thoughts, to scream silently, while Timothy cackled at his despair.

Rage's face twitched, his head twisting in every direction. His eyes were as wide as Greece's debt is deep; his pupils dilated to the size of aubergines (figuratively speaking. Appreciate the metaphor.)

His chest rose up and down as he breathed in heavily, his breaths short and laboured. With an agonising grunt he knelt to the ground, his nerves sending signals of pain to his spine and to his brain as if needles were stabbing into his body like acupuncture gone wrong and hooks were pulling out his very soul. Or half of his soul, at least.

Abruptly the pain ceased, and when his vision had cleared, his view was filled with a guy who looked just like him, only he had a snarl on his face and eyes that were deep pits of indubious doom.

"Hmm," pondered Rage out loud, "Curiouser and curiouser."

"Oh let me guess, we're all mad here?"

Rage blinked. "What are you going on about?"

"Alice in Wonderland...c'mon seriously. Don't make a reference that you can't even understand. Egit."

"I think you mean 'git',"

"Damn foolish plebian. Your pitifully simple mind probably can't even understand who I am."

"Of course I know who you are, a figment of my imagination. I'm still asleep right?"

With that, Timothy delivered a swift blow to the back of Rage's head. "Now, you're sleeping."


End file.
